Still Spinning

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This poem is just a fragment of a longer piece I was writing, and I hope to one day find the rest of it. I wrote it during a very sad time in my life; the last few weeks of my grandmother’s life. I spent many days and hours at her bedside in the hospital just holding her hand in silence.

It was also my senior year of high school, and I was balancing difficult classes like calculus and anatomy. Even though life was moving forward with homework, tests, sports, clubs,and meetings, my mind was never far from her. When I was by her side, I couldn’t focus on anything else. When I wasn’t there, I felt like I should be.

In those moments, it felt like my world had paused. Time stretched endlessly, filled with both sadness and the desperate need to hold on. Yet, while everything important to me stood still, the world around me kept spinning—and I felt as though it was spinning without me.